Out of corruption comes integrity

“Socrates: ... Do you intend then to avoid well-governed states and the higher forms of civilised society? And if you do will life be worth living?...” Crito 51D-52E

There's a fleeting picture of momentary headlines, seen in a bookshop in Inverness, while above is a snippet of timeless conversation, transcribed and to some extent imagined later by Plato, between Socrates and his friend Crito, as the latter tries to persuade him - for his children’s and his friends’ sake - to get out of Athens and escape the death penalty imposed on him by the democratic government of Athens. All this hardly 2500 years ago. I’m reminded of the biblical riddle in Judges “Out of the strong came forth sweetness”. Wild bees had made a hive inside the carcass of a lion killed by Samson (as a child I used to see the image on Tate & Lyle treacle tins at home). It is customary to criticise Socrates, and especially Plato, for anti-democratic values, as opposed to impulses, but it seems to me, as I study ‘The Last Days of Socrates’, having re-read the Meno, that Socrates died for an ideal of democracy as do most of those who fight for it, respecting the debated and questionable decision – 221 for acquittal and 280 against – to condemn him for heresy and corrupting the minds of the young. It is this paradox - that this form of government, which killed Socrates because he obeyed its decision, is more or less the same troublesome thing we allow to rule us now – messy, volatile, inconsistent and cruel, and occasionally sublime through the words and actions of exceptional people and events. Out of corruption, integrity? * * * A good letter from a Greek academic friend about my search on behalf of Thannassis and Kostas from somewhere in Europe arrived this morning:

Hello my friend! The truth is that my previous laptop got damaged and I lost all contacts (and the laptop). I am really glad that you e-mailed me. As a matter of fact, I will be off school this Thursday and I will be going to Greece on Friday, the same old way via Venice. I will stay in Corfu for two weeks, so we will be able to meet there. I have a two-day interview in xxx for a post in the xxx in Athens, but I will be there. I will have to come back to work in xxx on April 5th, but then I will take 4 days Easter (Greek) break and I will fly to Corfu. As far as the document goes, you know that perhaps some local(s) might have it stored somewhere without even knowing what it is all about. We can talk to some of them if you wish. Panagiotis Metallinos must be the tavern (XRYSOMALLIS) owner's grandfather. I have heard that as well about Corfiots wanting British influence on the island for many different reasons, security, ease in transport as British subjects and more. My uncle xxx xxxx (a great lawyer) told me the story. I also have a cousin who is a history expert that we could talk to him. Looking forward to our meeting, All the best! A

My delighted reply to A - a philosopher by the way:

Dear A. Your reply is an example of that makes historical research - or indeed any research - so exciting and pleasurable. Apart from that it's good to hear from you and I'm glad we are on line again. I will make a special note of your addresses. By the way I'm reading 'The Last Days of Socrates' again. Now I'm 66 it makes so much more sense than when it was required reading at school. What an irritating old man he must have been and how people - some people (including me I hope) - would have loved his company, and - I regret to say - got sadistic pleasure at watching Socrates running argumentative circles around over-opiniated and unperplexed people. I look forward to meeting in Corfu. Xerete, Simon

* * * Meanwhile back to the problem of the Victoria Jubilee Allotments and the prolonged delay in implementing the planning gain agreement with Birmingham City Council on the site.

Dear Cllr. Brom, VICTORIA JUBILEE ALLOTMENTS: DELAYED 106A IMPLEMENTATION My apologies for not being able to attend the forthcoming Ward Committee. I am visiting my mother in Scotland, and I have asked someone to raise this under matters of urgent local concern on Tuesday evening. The planning application - N/01514/03/FUL - to build on the VJA site with its accompanying Section 106A was determined in early 2004. In the Evening mail of 8 May 2005, Paul Flannery, technical director for Westbury Homes, said: "Westbury is legally obliged to comply with the terms of the 106 planning agreement and as part of this we will be fulfilling our plan to provide the allotments and playing fields as stipulated in this agreement. Existing hedgerows and trees required to be retained will be in accordance with our planning consent." It is now Spring 2008, a new developer has taken over from Westbury, and we see no signs of progress on the planning gain agreement to provide a cricket ground, football fields, changing rooms, allotments and gardeners' storage buildings, laid out and transferred to the city council and integrated into Handsworth Park. We have repeatedly heard that the developer cannot proceed until a given number of homes have been occupied but the local community were never informed of this clause in the consent at the time it was agreed. In the meantime Handsworth is missing needed spaces for leisure and recreation with all that such resources contribute to the area's social resilience. This matter was discussed at the last meeting of the Handsworth Park Association and I was asked by the committee to write to you to ask if you with other Ward Councillors, could arrange, as a matter of urgency, a meeting with representatives of Charles Church, the developer. It was hoped that this meeting could include our Community Planning Officer Alan Orr, the Chair of Handsworth Cricket Club, (Mr Basil Hylton on xxx & xxx), a member or members of the City Council's executive (Cllr Len Gregory? Cllr Ray Hassall?) with allotments and sport in their portfolio, the relevant Scrutiny Chair (Cllr.John Alden?), the Chair of the Handsworth Park Association Graham Winfield, hopefully myself, and Peter Short (and possibly Penny Smith, Asst. Director Leisure & Support Services) for Handsworth Park, and anyone else you judge appropriate. Thanking you as always for your continued concern and support. Yours sincerely Simon Baddeley, Handsworth Allotments Information Group * * * Obama's speech in Philadelphia - 37 minutes.

A problem - the promised playing fields

The Victoria Jubilee site in 2000

One of our most active ward councillors, Waseem Zaffar, sent a circular last week about a meeting this evening about youth provision in Handsworth.

Dear Friends.
Many members of the community and in particular young people living in Lozells, Birchfield and Handsworth have raised concerns with me relating to youth provision in the local area. Many have also asked about provision that will be available from the new MyPlace building to be opened soon located near the Aston Sixways Island.
Harry Fowler, the Head of Birmingham Youth Services has kindly accepted my invitation to attend a seminar and explain how youth provision in the local area is developing as well as plans for provision from the MyPlace centre. The seminar will take place on Wednesday, 6th June 2012 (6pm-8pm) at the Lozells Methodist Community Centre, 113 Lozells Street, Lozells, B19 2AP.
There will be an opportunity for those attending the seminar to ask questions. If you are unable to attend, but would like to ask a question, please email me waseem@waseemzaffar.co.uk and I would be more than happy to ask the question and get a response back to you.
Yours truly, Waseem Zaffar
 Councillor for Lozells and East Handsworth Ward
Chair of O & S Committee for Social Cohesion & Community Safety
Birmingham City Council
Telephone: 01215513300
Mobile: 07790161889
Post: 16 Heathfield Road, Birmingham B19 1HB
Website: www.waseemzaffar.com

Dear Waseem
SPORTS SPACE ON THE VICTORIA JUBILEE SITE
It remains the case, despite a succession of explanations that go back over at least six years, that the playing fields and sport pavilion promised under the S106A concluded between the city and the developer in 2004 - N/01514/03/FUL - remain undelivered (see the plan associated with this application). The potential for youth provision of the Victoria Jubilee site (VJA) - for young people living in Lozells, Birchfield and Handsworth - cannot be over-estimated.
I understand that the developer - now Persimmon Homes - is forever seeking ways to evade the original conditons of the S106A concluded so long ago. I understand that objections by a vociferous minority of new homeowners on the Victoriana estate about the planned location of the children’s play area included in the S106A has give further excuses for delaying the larger project, as has the Council’s understandable unwillingness to be landed with the expense of a sub-standard set of playing fields and a cheaper version of the promised sports pavilion. The developer and the city are still arguing about these standards and the resulting deadlock is being paid for by all those young people who could be enjoying this space and by the community as a whole who face the collateral damage to social cohesion caused by lack of youth provision.
Forgive the asperity in my tone, Waseem. Forgive me repeating myself. For all the help you have been to the community of late this is the one issue over which I am inclined to feel you have not expressed sufficient anger or made sufficient enquiries into the relative spread of responsibilities. Now that we again have a Labour leadership in Birmingham, I hope you and fellow councillors will not only make your feelings known on this matter tonight, but pursue that matter even more conscientiously than you have so far.
My question for tonight is: When will the long-delayed provision for young people represented by the sports fields and playing areas promised under the Section 106 Agreement concluded in May 2004 between the City Council and the developer of homes on the Victoria Jubilee Allotment site between Holly Road and Hamstead Road in Handsworth be implemented?

Latest plan showing the planned playing fields

You say you are more than happy to get a response back to questions submitted, but it is you and the larger community who should be getting the response. Of course I am interested in what emerges. if anything, by way of answers, but I now (at last) have my allotment. I now have no young family nor need for more exercise than I already get from digging! This is your problem. It is only mine in so far as I deplore the unfairness of this delay, given the surrender of scarce green space* from which the developer has profited without giving their agreed return under the S106A. Just to remind you again of the terms of that agreement:

D. Planning Application No. N/01514/03/FUL – Victoria Jubilee Allotments ... approved under a Section 106 agreement to provide the following:
• Eighty new municipal allotments plus an index linked payment of £21,000 towards their maintenance.
• An index linked sum of £27,000 towards the maintenance of a play area and £25,000 in lieu of a second play area.
• An index linked sum of £15,000 towards the regeneration of neighbouringHandsworth Park.
• Two playing pitches and a cricket square plus a pavilion and car parking to the Council design.
• The inclusion of twenty four affordable homes.

2005 - site cleared. 

I phoned Waseem to say I'd sent this letter. He said he'd phone me back in 5 minutes. He did.
"This is ridiculous" he said "we will do something about this"
He wrote, and posted at almost the same time he was on the phone to me, to the Chair of Planning and various others and asked me to come along to the church tonight to raise the issue.
"I promise I won't get angry" I said "but I am"
Waseem's letter with my letter to him attached, to which I've added job titles:

From: Councillor Waseem Zaffar
Subject: Fwd: REMINDER: Seminar with the Head of Birmingham Youth Services on provision proposed for the MyPlace Youth Centre near Aston Sixways, Wednesday 6pm-8pm
Date: 6 June 2012 10:41:21 GMT+01:00
To: Richard.Goulborn@birmingham.gov.uk (Interim Head of Planning Management)
Cc: mike.sharpe@birmingham.gov.uk (Chairman - Planning Committee), Simon Baddeley, Waheed.Nazir@birmingham.gov.uk (Waheed Nazir, Director of Planning and Regeneration), Simon.Hodge@birmingham.gov.uk (Simon Hodge, Senior Planning Office) 

Dear Dick. Please see an email below from local community activist Simon Baddeley regarding an outstanding section 106 agreement for a development in my ward. How do we get about getting the developer to implement the agreement put in place some eight years ago? I am very concerned about this. Thanking you in anticipation.
Waseem Zaffar

2006 - playing fields to cover western section of the Victoria Jubilee site

*One of several films - this one by the BBC in 1999 - made about the campaign to prevent building on the Victoria Jubilee Allotments (VJA). Here's another - Losing the Plot - made by my friend Nick Booth in 2000, again focusing on the loss of urban green space to building.
*** ***
Later in the day Waseem copied me this letter to him from Ghaz Hussein, Development Planning & Regeneration Manager, BCC Ghaz Hussain Birmingham City Council :

Dear Councillor Zaffar, l refer to the attached e-mails from Dick and Simon Baddeley. Although I helped negotiate the original S106 with the then developer (Westbury Homes), I have not had any direct involvement in this project for a number of years and given the time lapsed had assumed that the developer had met the necessary obligations. So it is a  little surprising to read Simon Baddeley's e-mail. I 'll therefore pick this up with my Planning Manager upon his return from leave next week to see how best we unlock the outstanding contributions from Persimmon Homes who have taken over from Westbury. I'll contact you as soon as I have established the state of play. Hope all is well otherwise and many congratulations on securing your Cabinet Member position. Kind regards. Ghaz Hussain

I got this letter on getting home from the meeting at Lozells Methodist Church. I said nothing at the two hour meeting. I was learning something of how youth provision worked, listening to an hour and half of questions to Harry Fowler, the Head of Birmingham Youth Services, who'd briefly presented a description of the soon-to-be-opened MyPlace centre in Aston...

...one of several £5 million buildings initiated by the previous Labour Government in 2007. Harry, a student of mine over ten years ago, told us that one of the challenges attached to this impressive building was the £350K annual cost of running the building, amid a funding famine. Harry spoke of the  work of the people involved, of the need for carefully selected partners, of finding a charging scale that was equitable. The meeting was uncontentious, all very grown-up and realistic about the world, and the several children there aged around 13-14 were attentive throughout, ready with intelligent questions.

Harry Fowler speaks at Lozells Methodist Church

As I took all this in I began to grasp a aspect of the problem of the delay in implementing the S106 Agreement on the playing fields on the Victoria Jubilee site. The capital side of the promised playing fields is given the agreement, but not the revenue side, and the scale of these - separate from other causes, explanations and excuses - gives pause for thought, indeed helps explain the delay in getting the playing fields up and running. Who will manage them, maintain them, organised their use, keep them secure, take responsibility for relationships with different users, decide who to charge for their use and how much users should pay...I need to understand this and take into account when lobbying on their behalf.
**** ****
Two hours on Plot 14. Tidying weeds from paths; planting runner beans and a marrow - between showers, which look to continue next week, while my mother tells me the weather in the Highlands is lovely.

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The Greek Orthodox Church is strongly liturgical. Religious services are scripted, not improvised. Every ritual, prayer and genuflection is the tip of a theological iceberg. Faithless, in ways I don't understand, these ceremonies are embracing - especially now. I'm not alone. I recall the words:

...we may suggest that Orthodoxy in Greece may be better understood as a 'way of life' rather (than) as an attachment to metaphysical beliefs. Unlike what happens in other European countries, being a communist, atheist, or agnostic does not preclude someone from attending Church celebrations in Greece. This attitude of the Greeks towards Orthodoxy is graphically exemplified in the words of a Greek dentist as it is narrated by Ware*: "Personally I am an atheist; but because I am Greek, I am of course a member of the Orthodox Church"

In Ano Korakiana Nick and Sophia - του Νίκου και της Σοφίας Ζερβόπουλου - our neighbours up Democracy Street, whose son Antony's wedding to Georgia at St Nicholas Geronton in town we attended in April were at a service in one of the village churches, Ag.Triada, a small church nestling amid trees about a mile south of the village on a lane off the road to Kato Korakiana, to celebrate the Holy Spirit - του Αγίου Πνεύματος - celebrating Greek Pentecost - few days later than the Latin - involving the breaking of bread, specifically five loaves of bread...αρτοκλασία, artoklasia (artos - bread, klao - to break)...In the photo in red is the village papas Kostas with Dr Savannis standing tall on his right hand.

Πραγματοποιήθηκε χθες το πρωί Όρθρος και στη συνέχεια Λειτουργία στο εκκλησάκι της Αγίας Τριάδας, ανήμερα της εορτής του Αγίου Πνεύματος. Την φετινή εορτή οργάνωσε η οικογένεια του Νίκου και της Σοφίας Ζερβόπουλου και σχεδόν άπαντες οι συνεπώνυμοι Ζερβοπουλαίοι έδωσαν το παρόν. Ο κόσμος ήταν αρκετός και εκτός από το μικρό ναό, συγκεντρώθηκε στον περιαύλιο χώρο, αναζητώντας την προστασία της σκιάς των ελαιοδέντρων, αφού οι ψαλμωδίες των τεσσάρων ιερέων και των πολλών ψαλτάδων, διαχέονταν σε αρκετή ακτίνα. Το πρόγραμμα της Λειτουργίας περιελάμβανε και αρτοκλασία την οποία επιμελήθηκε ο Αντώνης Ζερβόπουλος…

Yesterday morning a Matins Liturgy took place and later a Service held in the chapel of Agia Triada (Holy Trinity) on the very day of celebrating the feast of of the Holy Spirit. This year's celebrations were organised by the the family of Niko and Sophia Zervopoulos and almost all, bearing the name Zervopoulos, attended; some congregating on the forecourt of the tiny chapel, seeking the shade of the olive trees, since the chanting of the four priests and many cantors could be heard afar. The service also included the ritual of breaking bread led by Anthony Zervopoulos ...(Thanks to Aleko for help with translation).

 2 καὶ ἐγένετο ἄφνω ἐκ τοῦ οὐρανοῦ ἦχος ὥσπερ φερομένης πνοῆς βιαίας, καὶ ἐπλήρωσεν ὅλον τὸν οἶκον οὗ ἦσαν καθήμενοι· 3 καὶ ὤφθησαν αὐτοῖς διαμεριζόμεναι γλῶσσαι ὡσεὶ πυρός,

*Ware, K., The Church: A Time for Transition, pp. 208-227, in Clogg, R. (ed.), Greece in the 1980s (Basingstoke: MacMillan, 1983)
*** ***
More and more this continental crisis, potentially global according to our public leaders, is about whether Europe should become a federation, its members pooling their sovereignty under an agreed rule of law (described by one cynic as a number of wolves and sheep getting together to agree what they should have for supper), with fiscal controls that apply across the Eurozone. The interesting paradox; that subsidiarity - delegation of power to the lowest place where the capacity to exercise it exists - may work better inside a supra-national federation, especially now that the smallest hamlet can be in touch with the world and we learning more every day about the working of villages - learning that can be shared without intermediaries between villages in Australia, Borneo, Korea, Greece, Iceland, Brazil, China, Egypt, Iran or Canada. These places are emerging in many places and they are in touch with one another advancing their understanding of the complex fractious challenges of self-government. A village is not just a clearly bordered cluster amid countryside; it can also be a reverse cancer within a dysfunctional autodependent city. See my Los Angeles friend Richard Risemberg's posting on Denver's good, bad and ugly. The process of making Europe into a workable federation may well be given a shove at the next European summit on 28-29 June. Angela Merkel is 'playing down' the significance of this meeting, anticipating that if any such initiative is to float its launch will last for ever. 

Portents and omens

I was at St Silas' Church in Lozell's Road for our ward committee meeting last night. I raised the matter of the Victoria Jubilee Allotments S106A. 'We all know what this is about. So when?" The best I could get was an assurance that the Constituency Planning Officer would report to the next meeting on 21 January. I'm thinking. This evening, after I'd sent an e-mail to Kay Alexander about 'the flytipping menace', Ashley Blake of Midlands Today came round to do a one minute live slot (on YouTube) about the photos I've attracted to Flickr. On the OB camera was Ellen who remembered me from editing the film Nick Booth conceived and directed in 2000 on The Victoria Jubilee Allotments - Losing the Plot. She was interested in the waiting land. Adrian Goldberg has done a piece in The Stirrer and promises to stay on the case. Cllr Kim Brom (link no longer active) said after the meeting she'd press Alan Orr for news about the S106A over the next few days. Note: Alan Orr's letter of 30 April '08 :

The Agreement relates to the Heads of Terms as approved by the Development Control Committee on 13th May 2004 re application: N/01514/03/FUL . The main Heads were:

a). Provision of 80 allotments on site and their transfer to the City Council. b). Provision of a tertiary (toddlers) play area and associated open space (on site), and the payment of £25,000 in lieu of the provision of a secondary ( for older children) play area. c). A financial contribution of £150,800 towards open space improvements off-site. d). The provision of two playing pitches and a cricket square, a pavilion changing room facility and car parking, and their transfer to the City Council. e). The provision of 24 affordable housing units on site. The S106 Agreement was completed on 23rd August, 2004, executing the above Heads of Terms. To date, no changes to the Agreement have been made. In respect of its implementation, in terms of the affordable housing units, to my knowledge these have been provided. Indeed, I understand that as the developer (initially Westbury Homes, and now Charles Church) entered into a partnership with more than one Registered Social Landlord, the provision of affordable housing on the site is in excess of that required under the S106 Agreement which will have been to the benefit of meeting local need for such housing. In respect of the other provisions of the Agreement, as is the common practice their delivery is related to a number of 'triggers' depending on the stage of the overall development or the housing element of the development. Thus, the provision of the allotments and the sports pitches is related to the occupation of 40 open market dwellings on the new housing development (the 40 dwellings does not include the 24 affordable housing units). Currently, the sports pitches have been laid out but their transfer to the City awaits the completion of the changing room pavilion and associated car park.

* * * * Had my third lesson at Apple in the Bullring this morning with a different Ash. This time I was introduced to MPEG Streamclip, free software to convert a variety of video files and learn about the H264 codec. My grasp with these ways of making films is steadily increasing. We even discussed the idea of a website with text and streamed videos to help explore dynamic at the political-management interface. I haven't got a graphics chip on my MacBook so I need to do film processing - except for tiny clips on the big computer at home. * * * * Karen Van Hoff and her daughters came for the weekend and we talked, looked over Richard's website (see also) for her, played karaoke via the laptop, sang along with Leonard Cohen, especially Democracy, over and over went in and out of town and laughed a lot and got the good news that my brother George's first pub stand-up routine in London had gone really well and he'll send me a film of the evening. * * * * A flower delivery came yesterday for Linda from Saga's Customer Services thanking her for pointing out an error in the pensions advice from Paul Lewis on page 174 of their November Issue

'If you delay claiming your pension, either to get increments or the lump sum, there is a risk you may never live to enjoy it. If you die before you claim your pension, no-one can claim the lump sum.'

We rechecked it with the Pensions Service - phone answered quickly and explanations given clearly. Yes, that advice is incorrect. Sighs of relief, but Lin took the extra trouble of phoning Saga. They too were good on phone answering and I thought the flowers, a few days later, a really nice gesture for Lin taking the trouble to suggest others might be confused - especially as Lewis is so good on money advice - self described as a capitalist-socialist. * * * * Watching the 44th creating his government is just fascinating - for an academic to watch the process of government formation in a democracy; for any citizens anywhere, including me, to learn what follows the vote, especially with this US transition phenomenon of two months between election and inauguration. Who will be Obama's Treasury Secretary? Who determines the terms of any GM bail-out - the incumbent or the elect? Has it ever been possible for so many outside the Beltway to watch this process in a time so freighted with portents and omens. * * * * The news from north Corfu involving famous names is eclipsing a more significant and dramatic sequence of events further south in Corfu's village of Lefkimi - a series of escalating confrontations between riot police and villagers protesting against a large landfill site of dubious legality. Today's Kathimerini reports a repeat - yesterday morning - of protests at Lefkimi against the landfill being built there. Police and locals fought earlier in the year; in January, May (see also) and June. This week a police car was burned and village protestors injured in dawn encounters with the police. There were barricades, fireworks and stones and over forty arrested. News is sporadic. This is Brabant for the BBC in October 08. This is an angry Brit in June 08 on a Greek blog continuing to the present and this is from Earth First - an international environmental group supporting direct actions. The online Greek-English newspaper, Corfu Today, 22 November 08, posted on HolidayCorfu:

In Prosecutor, led the noon march in which 46 people were arrested in yesterday's incidents in Lefkimmi. Among the categories are facing serious injury when police, insulting and threatening a continuation. Trial date was set for Monday but is expected to set new trial date because of the planned mobilization of lawyers and occupy the courts. The incidents yesterday in Lefkimmi resulted in burning of a patrol car, and rolled, but many arrest and outbursts are the result of tension once again created yesterday outside the site of the landfill. About 150 residents of the area react to the creation of the landfill, by decision of the Steering Committee set up yesterday morning proceeded to capture the road leading to the creation of installation. The tension culminated on 3 after noon when, during the shift change of SWAT men to supervise the area since early last summer, created incidents which culminated when some of pooled burned down the police jeep. A few minutes later, the arrested 46 were brought in. Safety for participating in the episodes, episodes from the slightly injured one of the demonstrators, who moved to the Center for Health Lefkimi to him first aid. The seizure of the road ended late last night.

* * * At Frederick Adam's beautifully restored neo-classical house at Kanoni (the one with the silly name 'Mon Repos') there's an exhibition of old black and white photos of Corfu by John Davenport Shakespear, an army officer, living with his family before its union with Greece in 1862. Wounded in the Crimean War, he returned to England, married Louisa Caroline Sayer, They moved to Corfu where their daughter was born and met Edward Lear, from whom Shakespear bought the photographic equipment he used to make this permanent exhibition.

Our shed and all it contains

Yesterday Linda and I finally assembled the shed on our allotment - our Birmingham apothiki, την αποθήκη. Imram helped us lift the roof into place where it 'clicked' satisfyingly over the four walls. Then I loosened the hinges on the door and fitted that. It doesn't block our view of the park. It needs something transparent like perspex for windows, hooks and shelves inside, plus various small repairs where we cut it up to transport it after finding it in Walsall on freegle, but having a shed on plot 14 marks another stage in getting our allotment together, and of course we can share its use with Robin and Rachel. While on the plot today, Lin went on to rake and grade part of the ground I'd dug over last week making it look dark and fecund. Meantime potatoes are starting to flower and other plantings advance.

Our progress is slow compared to some plotholders but it's very satisfying to make comparisons with the state of our plot a year ago year, or the situation on 30 December 2008 when, as part of our continuing campaign to recover the Victoria Jubilee Allotments. I wrote to the Birmingham Post:

Dear Editor, In 2004, having fought for ten years to prevent losing more green space in Handsworth, campaigners were forced to accept the decision, by a small margin of the councillors on Birmingham’s Planning Committee, to negotiate a Section 106 Agreement to permit new homes to be built on the Victoria Jubilee Allotments (VJA) – a private site neglected by its owners. Can it be that having taken a profit from the houses they and their predecessors, Westbury Homes, have built and sold on the VJA, the current developer, Charles Church*, is seeking permission to renegotiate the agreement made with the Council and – implicitly – with a most active community (Jane Tyler, Birmingham Post, December 24, 2008)? We, with many others, anticipating trends now acknowledged by Government, (e.g. Baroness Andrews’ Introduction to ‘Growing in the Community’ 2nd ed.2008) argued convincingly that there was enough demand for allotments for the whole VJA site to be afforded the protection allotments are allowed by statute and Planning Guidance (PPG17). The city planner’s lower estimate of that demand was used to sway the Committee to approve the application to build houses on the allotments. In May 2007 we were assured by Alan Orr, Perry Barr Community Planning Officer, that new houses had been sold in sufficient numbers to trigger the next stage of the S106A – three playing fields, including a cricket pitch, and 80 allotments. How brash if now, having taken their profit, Charles Church claim themselves ‘burdened’ by the terms on which they made it. Yours, Simon Baddeley, Handsworth Allotments Information Group (HAIG)
*Since 2009 for Charles Church read Persimmon Homes

Thus have I moved in just over a year from the conclusion of a decade-long campaign for the idea of allotments to the real thing. Surprising myself.
Imram who helped us with our shed is also, following a successful bid to the Lottery Awards for All Fund, leading on creating a sensory garden on Plot 79 next to the gates into the VJA. A neighbouring plotholder, Jeevan Singh, sent me a picture of Imram and volunteers working on the early stages of a plot which will be open to all. The site will have other plots especially for particular groups and there is to be a council plot mainly for schoolchildren.

Volunteers preparing the sensory garden

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Oriana, my half sister, Professor at Chelsea, wrote with a letter attached:

Dear Simon. I thought you might be interested in this? Hope all is well. Xx oriana

The attached letter - on an academic matter - included this:

Dear Professor Baddeley....Upon initial arrival in London in September 1964, I found a magnificent one bedroom flat for let at 5 Bina Gardens, London SW 5. The interview for becoming a tenant took place somewhere in Mayfair with a very distinguished older woman by the name of Mrs. Maine. It became known to me, later on, while residing at 5 Bina Gardens, that she had grown children, one of whom had the last name of Baddeley. I remember chatting to her grandson, Simon, on several occasions. If memory serves me correctly, she had either a son or daughter who was well known in the British theatre. Seeing your name brings back those memories, and I am wondering if you have any relation to the Baddeley family? If this is not the case, please forgive my enquiring curiosity, but one never knows unless one asks...Musically yours from Chicago, Elisabeth Matesky (American Violinist/ Artist Teacher of Violin and Chamber Music/ Composer-Arranger for Solo Violin/ Musical Writer and Speaker) 

Me - back to my sister:

Dear Oriana. The longer we live the more likely it is that things will come round again. Thanks for this. I’d never actually forgotten Elisabeth. She’s a very special talent. ... About two years ago remembering one time long ago, I wrote a friend: 'We had a young American violinist upstairs - when I was a post-grad aimless in a big old place on the Earls Court-Kensington border a mile north of the Thames. I'd hear her practising through two floors and we'd nod in the hallway. One evening - just before she played a concert at QE Hall - I was giving a dinner party with tables pulled together for about twelve ex-uni friends (when food was cheap) she knocked on my door. "Come in come in, Elizabeth" (I knew her name. Lots of people did, and here was I looking as if she was an extra guest. Wow!) She said "Hi! I won't eat. I'll have a glass of wine. If that's OK?" So she joined our happy conversation. After about half-an-hour - can't remember - she said "Hold on" and dashed off. Well that's that, I thought. A minute later she's back - with that violin. Wood like fine porcelain, looking as if it was held together by polish. "Would you like me to play?" (No. Can't you see we're having a nice conversation?) "Yes yes yes" So she did. Standing just beside me. Except far off, from the stalls, I'd never seen a talent at work. When she hit the strings with her bow I swear bits and pieces flew off. She near looked to break the thing. I couldn't believe the volume she drew from it, fighting it, driving it like I've only seen in close-up shot on tele, but you know how with boxing even the close ups don't show the violence and the danger that excites some people. I saw. We saw and heard. So so beautiful. And she made it look easy. Heart stopping. I was weeping, shaking in a most un-English way - and do now - as I recount that 30 minutes of her generosity to me and my friends.'    ...  How are you all? We are as you know back and forth between Corfu and UK – two homes and two small worlds in each. It’d be lovely to see you and catch up on your perspectives. How are things for god-trodden St Catherine’s given current events in the Middle East? As for Murdoch...what schadenfreude, what quiet pleasure it is to see Ramasses becoming Ozymandias, meeting his due. XXXX Simon

** ** ** **
On Monday morning Lin, Denise and me had a meeting with Jo Burrill, Regeneration Project Officer for Midland Heart to brief her on how things are going with the Handsworth Practical Care Project. The project has a history of doing work for the housing association based in Birmingham with many properties in Handsworth.

And on Tuesday afternoon Lin and I met Sharon and Vicky at Birmingham Voluntary Service Council (BVSC) in Digbeth to learn about the assistance they give to projects like CHPC by way of handling wage packages, including tax and national insurance. They had a long association with the project that for been ended in June 2010.

******* *******
Clavering was the Essex village where I was born. For the last 6 months I've been exchanging emails and images with Jacqueline Cooper who emailed me in April (see also):

Dear Mr Baddeley. I have enjoyed looking at your various websites, which I found on a Clavering search. I was interested to see some photos of Barbara Maine when she lived in Clavering, and wondered if you would give permission for me to copy them for our archives? we are having a local history exhibition in September and I am particularly looking for WW2 material and photos. Many thanks, Jacqueline Cooper, Clavering Local History Recorder, Essex.

19 April '11: Dear Jacqueline. How nice to hear from you. My mother – Barbara – who if you have been looking at my website you may know lives in the Highlands. I’ve been capturing some of her recollections on video, a project we both enjoy. I’ll see her at the end of  May and perhaps we could do a short memoir (6-7 minutes) on video about Clavering, where of course she lived as a child and where she was married and where I was born, at Mill End Dairy Farm. Did you see the picture of me sat on the cart pony Gypsy with my aunt, and grandmother, Bar Maine. I’m pretty sure my mum took that snap. Of course you can use the pictures. I’m sure my mother will be pleased and not mind me giving you her permission. You’ll probably have come across the brief account of how Fl Lt Bobby Jeff (names on the Battle of Britain memorial  as one of ‘the few’), who was set to marry my aunt, Margot (holding the horse in the photo I’ve mentioned), was shot down and reported MIA only days before they were to be married. My grandmother recalls the postman cycling up the lane and thinking she ‘knew’ what news he brought. It was a telegram. All the wedding presents were laid out ready at Mill End. I also have memories of Caton’s Store on the ridge between the village and Mill End Farm. We see it on google now and then. I congratulate you on putting together a history exhibition, especially now when people are feeling gloomy about the economy, many with good reason. Best wishes, Simon 

In her reply Jacqueline mentioned 'Simon...I know Mill End Dairy Farm quite well, although of course it has long since ceased to be a farm. The family there now are Scottish as it happen s- the Inglis (or were when I was there). Some years ago, when my children were still at school, I used to do gardening for a few people including them, just one morning a week but it was a nice garden to work in, right beside Elm Street Lane. There is a huge tree, quite a rare one I thought might be a Black Poplar - maybe it was there in your childhood too. I think I recognise the painting of the outbuilding, which was still in use when I was there, I have the feeling it had been converted into something, but not sure. It would be good to see some more photos of when it was a farm. In a field near there now are some llamas or alpacas, not sure if they belong to the Inglis or someone else. Catons is not a store now, it has recently been bought by someone wealthy who has done a lot of rebuilding etc but at least the old windmill has been repaired.'

My birthplace

Jacqueline sent me a picture she took of Mill End in the last 20 years.  My mother sold the house after Bar, my grandmother, her mother, died in 1969. It seems hardly changed, though Jacqueline tells me there have been many changes since this picture was taken. I was born on Sunday 29 March 1942 in the room behind the far right window on the bottom floor.

A display Jacqueline's made for the Clavering history exhibition

Back to the future - 13 February 2014 
Matt McGinn sent me an email and a photo of one of the mills above Mill End beside Caton's Store - in the year before I was born. I am so grateful when people think of communicating with a stranger about something like this - especially for a placeless person like me it's wonderful to have these piquant dishes of local and personal history:

Dear Simon, I have just watched the wonderful clip of your Mother reminiscing about her time in Clavering. We purchased the Windmill where the shop used to be and it was fascinating to hear stories about the people and the places surrounding the Mill. Mill End is still an idyllic cottage and I'm sure your Mother would be pleased to have known that they still keep many Horses there. I am attaching a picture of the Mill as it was in 1941. Many thanks for your posting. Best regards Matt McGinn, Clavering Mill

Νῦν ἀπολύεις - Victoria Jubilee Allotments

At last!

Yes indeed! At last the waiting is over. Επιτέλους η αναμονή τελείωσε.

(Note: Adrian Stagg has reminded me that 'first come, first served basis' refers to those who added their names to a short list over the last year; not to anyone just turning up. This tends to strengthen a rumour that the Council's short list of those wishing to work plots on the VJA may already exceed the number of plots - a problem that tends to be resolved by halving plots and the inevitability of drop-outs)

We can turn from campaigning to digging, planting, growing and harvesting our own food. Last year Lin and I made a compact to share a plot with our neighbour Rachel Chiu and family, reckoning our diaries overlap enough to co-operates while being separate enough to allow a division of labour.

I spoke to Rachel this evening - just back from work, heading for a meet of the Handsworth Park Association. "See you Saturday", "What can we plant this time of year?" We pondered this. "We're away most of the summer" "But we're here until the end of August." "I think we can work on getting the soil right; perhaps get a shed put up, and plant early potatoes that'd be ready for spring 2010 along with turnips and...."

With the new allotments becoming available, it is to be hoped that the playing fields - two soccer, one cricket - plus children's playground plus changing pavilion that came with the 2004 Planning Gain Agreement (S106A), will be up and running this year (see Help Me Investigate).

2003 plan - N/01514/03/FUL - submitted to Birmingham City Council by Westbury Homes (enlarge)

E-mail from Clive Birch, Chair of Birmingham & District Allotments Association:

Been a long battle, am meeting tenants on 10th July with view to formation of allotment association.

Meeting at The Sons of Rest in Handsworth Park ~ 10 July 2010

E-mail from Adrian Stagg:

Simon, Morning. Its down to the plotholders now to make the site vibrant and hopefully one of the best in the City. We've done all we can to facilitate a high spec allotments site. Its there for people to enjoy and make their own. Adrian

E-mail from Stephen Hartland, Chair of Birmingham's Victorian Society

Well done Simon. What a way to celebrate HM's official birthday.

E-mail from Betty at Walsall Road Allotments to whom I'd passed the news:

Dear Simon. No, I hadn't heard the good news - congratulations! How many plots will be available on Saturday, and do you have a waiting-list? I hope all goes well for you and that lots of prospective plotholders turn up. Betty

E-mail from an old friend:

At last indeed. Simon was a(n even) young(er) man when he started campaigning for this development 20 years ago! And along the way prevented the site becoming entirely housing. Anyway, megathanks from myself and no doubt several dozen others for his foresight and industry, and likewise in respect of the adjoining park which he did so much to get restored, even though of course others have had a hand in making these things happen. Robin

..and another, from Zarina Bhatia:

Wow! This was just yesterday, I shall visit the site on one of my walks to the Park soon. What achievement for our so pluralistic community of Handsworth! BRAVO, Simon!

and from The Stirrer:

fantastic - well done. Adrian Goldberg

www.thestirrer.com

From Karen Leach, Coordinator Localise West Midlands:

fantastic news! Sorry we (bfoe) weren't much help towards the end but brilliant to hear your persistence paid off! best wishes. Karen

From Basil Hylton, Handsworth Cricket Club, long term successful campaigner for sport in Handsworth and beyond:

Hi Simon, Congratulations. The community owes you a debt of gratitude for your hard tenacious slog at this matter. Well done as gardeners can now look to securing their plots and to the fruits of their labour. Wish that the issue around cricket was going well. But then, that is a long story. You take care, and all the best. Basil

From our old childminder, Pauline Gallagher:

May the grass be green and the plots be vibrant- Well done Simon !!!!

From Ano Korakiana:

Hi Simon. Well done on the allotmen'ts side of the fence. Enjoy your digging and your fruits of hard labour. Mark.

I phoned Paul Peacock in the Pennines. He reminded me it would be tricky to get seed potatoes, but try Pentland Javelins. some turnips. lettuce, beetroot...

Previous air photo of the site before building - the old Victoria Jubilee Allotments

Air photo two years ago showing rough location of the new VJA

Nick Booth's 2000 documentary 'Losing the Plot', a BBC Midlands Report about the midway stage of the campaign to save the VJA

X-ref: Democracy Street on 'the politics of urban green space'

* * * *

I saw this pilot logo recently - for the highest quality olive oil from Corfu - a product in mind, not yet in production. I liked the Septinsular lion against Corfu's verdant green, coach green, British racing green - plus the yellow of the lion like sun shining through a bottle of oil:

* * * Meanwhile sheep shearing and wool preparation in Ano Korakiana....and I 've been pointed by Aris - who designed the logo above - towards the work of Maria Couroucli...and - scrolling down this list of research projects supported by the Latsis Foundation I see this work on local memory by Helen Hristopoulou of the Ionian University on Urban Collective Memory through Time and Space:

Urban memory is a form of collective memory developed about a place through time. Generations pass memories about their birthplaces to one another mainly through verbal narrations and testimonials of significant events occurred in the past, usually pertaining to a restricted audience of family members or members of similar small social groups. As a result, such valuable memories are isolated, not interacting with each other to designate collective memories, eventually fading away as time goes by. The project will provide a database for documenting and preserving collections of memories. Such a database will be then utilized to issue representations of Corfu memories, offering an educational environment for children and pupils. Finally, the project will offer a web-based application environment to disseminate recorded Corfu memories in terms of interactive 3D Maps, in a web context employing various semantic tags and subject descriptors to facilitate end-users to browse urban collective memory through time and space dimensions.

This is how it happens...

This is how it happens. A space entirely green – private garden, allotment with trees and hedges, playing field - is taken over for building a new estate of private houses. Local people campaign against this for a decade helping to win planning gain concessions which, as anticipated by the developer, reduces the original footprint of hard surface by 50% or even more. The houses are built and occupied. The original application included two 1930s houses on the main road. One was demolished to create Victoriana Way – the road that leads into the estate – the other was converted into a temporary sales office, its front garden hard surfaced to allow would-be buyers to park. This house, after the new estate was mainly occupied, was sold privately, but only after a new property with detached garage had been built on half of the old house’s rich back garden, and a double garage built into its other half. Whittle away, whittle whittle, whittle. The new owner of the old house has submitted a planning application to build another two storey house on top of this double garage which he declares ‘surplus to requirements’ – hardly surprising given the parking now available on his frontage - extending into the small space left behind his house for a lawn. Is this worth making a fuss about? Isn’t the main damage already done? Lin and I, since our road’s residents’ opinion has been formally requested, submitted an objection.

From: planning.comments@birmingham.gov.uk

Subject: Comments on 2012/05776/PA have been received by the council.

Date: 30 August 2012 18:35:39 EEST

Comments made by Simon Baddeley of Beaudesert Road Residents

Thank you for informing us about this application to build a two storey house at the rear of 179 Hamstead Road, Handsworth, Birmingham, B20 2RL - 2012/05776/PA.
We believe that approving the proposed building will be detrimental to the area and therefore object to the application. Our objection is submitted in the context of policies to enhance the ‘liveability’ of our city, safety and security partnerships, the restoration of parks, street improvement schemes and measures to generate housing markets and the importance of not approving planning applications which set precedents contrary to these policies.For some, getting planning permission to dispose of part of their back garden for building is tantamount to finding oil there – especially if they are minded to take the profit and live elsewhere on the proceeds, bequeathing the in-filling to their abandoned neighbours. Parks and allotments and sometimes playing fields enjoy some statutory protection. Far fewer incentives or disincentives exist to protect private green space. 

Relentlessly we see the whittling away of city green space, diminishing the aesthetic of ‘leafy suburbs’, depleting the wildlife these spaces support, removing the Co2 processing capacity provided by trees and the absorbency that lessens flooding. Car ownership continues to rise. Everywhere we see householders and landlords slabbing over front and back gardens for yet more parking, building single, and in this case, even double garages on them. The Council, whilst constantly proclaiming its commitment to a cleaner, greener city, helps accelerate the hard-surfacing of Birmingham by approving applications of this kind. One reason for our objection to this application is that this development will destroy yet more green space, in an area that already has substantially less than the minimum recommended percentage of such space per head of population. The loss of even small green spaces in Handsworth, when aggregated, contributes to the continuing degradation of the urban environment, taking away yet more play areas, opportunities for cultivation and the capacity to absorb rainwater, subtracting from the local store of precipitated water and encouraging flash floods inside and, in the case of Handsworth, eastward into Perry Barr and the Tame River basin. 

This application involves the construction of a property extending over a recently built double garage in what was yet another mature garden next to Hampstead Road in an area that has already seen substantial and unpopular in-filling over recent decades. Between 2005-2008, no fewer than 84 new properties were constructed by Westbury Homes, now Persimmon Homes (ref: No. N/01514/03/FUL) on a large part of the Victoria Jubilee Allotments. Prior to that some 21 properties were constructed around a new road backing on to Bowling Green Lane and before that further houses were built around Crick Lane on another part of the Victoria Jubilee Allotments site.Another concern is that the applicant, whether intentionally or unintentionally, has created a back garden beside a new double garage, which consists of no more than a small lawn, as a precedent for circumventing advice on maintaining bio-diversity contained in the City’s 2008 Mature Suburbs Planning Guidance. It is through actions like these - equivalent of environmental ‘death by a thousand cuts’ - that our community experiences a relentless whittling away of its remaining green space; in this case a back garden made available for another house, in many other cases, gardens - front and back - stripped of lawns, flower beds, shrubs and trees to create yet more car-parking; homes with such tiny play-spaces for young children that they drop out of the family housing market, and become more liable for multi-occupation in an area already acknowledged as being blighted by an overabundance of such properties.  On this basis we withhold approval of any further hard surfaces being laid on our limited supply of green space, much of which has suffered from intense development over the years, not least the aforementioned estate accessed by Victoriana Way which from 2004 was built on private allotments.
As an additional reason for refusing this application we cite the planned development application N/04912/05/OUT in the rear of 173 Hamstead Road, Handsworth, B20 2RL rejected by the Planning Committee in 2005, for reasons which include those contained in our present objection to this application.
At first sight this application, with its required design and access statement, would appear  to conform to the City’s 2008 Mature Suburbs Planning Guidance on controlling residential intensification. The building shown in the application’s accompanying documents seeks to fit the style of other houses recently built on the new Victoriana Way and will be built over a recently constructed double garage, and extending into green space which, for the time being, is the applicant’s own back garden. 

But this application is far from an example of ‘preserving what is good and not making worse what is less good’ (first principle of Environmental Policy Advice 3.8 in the Birmingham Plan). However closely the proposed building matches the local vernacular with existing access to Victoriana Way, the fact remains that it is being built in a back garden. It represents yet another of many attempts at getting a windfall development past the planning rules and is clearly yet another opportunistic attempt at in-filling in one of Birmingham's best known ‘mature suburbs’.

*** ***

Jacqueline emailed me with an announcement. She’s archivist for Clavering in Essex, the village where I and my sister were born at Mill End Dairy Farm. Last year, I’d sent Jacqueline mementoes of my grandmother, Bar, and my mum, Barbara, for use in her book: ‘The story of the people of Clavering, at home and in service, during the Second World War’. 190 pages. 200+ illustrations. Fully indexed.

BOOK LAUNCH COFFEE MORNING

Clavering at War by Jacqueline Cooper
Saturday 29 September 11am - 1 pm
Clavering Christian Centre (former URC), Stortford Road

All welcome for coffee and cakes and the new book!

Enquiries  from author tel 01799 550462

Email jacqueline.cooper@virgin.net

Books from 24 Pelham Road, Clavering, Essex CB11 4PQ   £10 + pp postal copies

I guess it shows that I’m buccaneering the truth when on other occasions I say that all I learned of the countryside came from growing up with my stepfather, Jack. My grandmother, Bar Maine, bought an old cottage in Clavering in the 1930s and turned it into a farm – with Jersey cows, hens – full size as well as bantams – geese and some horses. 

Me on Gypsy, Bar on the hay wagon around 1945

She continued to live in and visit London, but the farm was her home, the place where she died in 1969. Jacqueline tells me it’s now a riding school and that its owner would be happy for me to arrange a visit. I shall certainly buy the book. I’m not sure it would be a good idea to revisit Mill End, despite its owner’s generous offer. Some things are meant to remain in another country, always present in imagination.

****

On Wednesday evening we drove down to the city to see the Edward Lear Exhibition - oil paintings, watercolours, drawings and engravings - brilliantly curated by Despina Zernioti -ζερνιώτη δέσποινα - displayed in a wonderfully made temporary structure, with gaps through which one glimpsed the grand décor of the palace...

... intended by Sir Thomas Maitland to impress the Ionians under our benign protection, by a talented team of helpers and supporters inside the Palace of St Michael and St George at the head of the Liston. We were entertained by one of the city bands in company with an assembly of visitors, here to say farewell to the exhibition which had run since May. 

Once I had read the journals of his almost solitary travels across Greece and Albania, and  a DVD series made a few years ago, that followed his routes comparing his landscapes with the same places now, I had to stop thinking of Lear as I, and most of his admirers still do, as a writer of enduring nonsense rhymes. Compared to Lear’s artistry in evoking a fascination with and love of place – especially Greece and most of all Corfu - his unique contribution to nonsense, long before Dadaism and Surrealism, seems a side line, possibly a sort of self-ridiculing compensation according to a psychological appreciation – one among five brilliantly illuminating essays in the exhibition catalogue – by Anthony Stevens. 

The Edward Lear Exhibition catalogue

An endearing and memorable clown becomes a troubled and courageous genius, explorer and remembrancer, his pen and brush connecting his eye and heart to the places through which he travels, touching things, even the sky and distant prospects – pre-photographic images as accurate and truthful as the most advanced cameras. One small sketch shows the Parthenon looming in isolated majesty beyond a grove of trees, surrounded by broad meadows. Amid the enthusiastic chat and pacings around the lovely exhibits I stared at these delicate tantalising landscapes, securely framed, protected by glass, neatly titled, I could hear their silence; grieve for the unreachable magic that Lear almost allows us to touch, and see and smell. We left morose, as I suspect did others.

Παλαιοκαστρίτσα - Paleocastritsa by Edward Lear

“When choosing somewhere to live” advised my stepfather, “settle somewhere where you can’t be disappointed. Go somewhere that has been comprehensively ruined” 
We’ve tried to do that and by and large succeeded. 
The Pimping of  Panorea by Maria Strani-Potts....Maria used this parable about Corfu where she was born, a citizen of the island.

...For years they had hated hard work and had come to resent the fact that they had to work in the fields and on the sea in order to survive. It is not known who had the idea first, but the notion that the time was ripe to exploit Panorea and to benefit from her eternal qualities sprang up suddenly and quickly spread widely amongst them. They decided that if they turned Panorea into a prostitute, they would benefit enormously. Panorea was so well known in the world, so popular, that they would have no problem in selling her charms at any price; so one morning members of the clan woke up, determined to take the lead in becoming her pimps. This would be beneficial to all, they proclaimed. It was such an easy thing to do. Panorea had been a muse to poets, painters, and writers. Kings, Emperors, and Empresses adored her and visited her often, and many scholars studied her history.  Pimping appealed to them; it was neither burdensome, demanding, nor did it need careful planning. They needed neither a substantial capital investment nor much in the way of hard work. In a very short space of time Panorea was turned into a commodity. In the beginning, fresh and wonderful as she was, she brought vast profits and satisfaction to her clients.....

Maria's writing always echoes in my mind, almost sounding aloud over my shoulder as I wandered by Lear's pictures of Corfu. I imagined a refutatory paragraph...

The woman is claiming rape. I detest and refute her ridiculous allegation. Even though it seems hardly necessary, I 've apologised - fulsomely and sincerely - for any hurt she may claim to have experienced as a  result of our very brief liaison. I've leaned over backwards to respect her temperament and sensitivities. Not only that, I have paid, through my lawyers, a generous sum to ensure that her exaggerated and embarrassing allegations are never brought to court. I am more than aware of the seriousness of the crime I'm so unfairly accused of, and in that light I have also given a very large donation to a local rape-crisis centre and indicated my readiness to fund the woman's visits. I will even pay for her to have long term psychiatric care, if she persists in succumbing to the mental problems she's managed to get her advisors to define as the result of 'a traumatic assault' bearing no relationship to actual events or the circumstances of our acquaintance - if that is what it was. If anyone has suffered with the level of hysteria and fuss surrounding what some might even view as a formative and even exciting experience, it is me.